The Leach

In a body cast with a hole in the stomach area he spent his waking hours chasing after her, she was barely a year old and quite the handful.  "BaBa" she would yell as she banged her little fist on the refrigerator.....most would think she meant a bottle but he knew she wanted a slice of the stick bologna that he had in the fridge. He would struggle, in pain and get her what she wanted because she was his weakness, she was his baby girl. Once she got her piece of bologna he would lay down and she would crawl up and lay down on his belly, right in the hole in the cast and that is how she became "The Leach"!

No matter where he was she was hanging on to his leg. He was hard pressed to have an adult conversation with the men at a party because his little leach was always hanging on. He never seemed to mind, in fact he spoiled her rotten. When she was barely two years old he found a little car that he wanted her to have, however he thought it should be red. He bought it and took it down to a body shop and had it painted red so that his little leach would have her little red car. Her Mom described the scene when they picked it up. "Right between a big truck and a sedan here sat this little red car on a hoist....It was shameful!" she would say.The day after he brought it home his little leach laughed with glee then beat it up with a big spoon, chipping the beautiful red paint that he had just spent their grocery money on..... he just laughed.....after all....she could do no wrong in his eyes.

As the years passed nothing changed, she was always one of the boys and right by her Daddy......even when they wanted to have some male bonding time! There were times when her brothers and Dad would have to sneak out just to have that time and her Daddy knew he would be wracked with guilt and have to make up to her.....always! They went fishing....she went fishing....they had BB guns....she had one too....they jumped on motorcylces.....hers had to be bigger....all the while he encouraged her and let her be herself. He always made her feel safe no matter what she did.

I am that "leach" and that man was the best Daddy any little girl could have......He made me feel safe and empowered.....he was like that eagle that soars so high and I was the little butterfly resting on his wing.....This is just the beginning of a chapter about my Daddy.....and it will take many chapters to cover his life....He was more than just an amazing Dad.....he was a great man and a mentor to many....so there will be more to come!

VISION

"As the car decended upon the coast, I drew a breathe of fresh sea air, it was as if I were breathing in a thousand little fingers massaging all of the stress from my body. This is where I feel home.....this is where I feel peace....this must be the place I am headed to....soon!" This paragraph has been in my drafts for a year now and for the first time I believe it to be true, I believe that I will be exactly where I want to be......


Sitting on the balcony above the ocean, breathing in the salty air I close my eyes and become my vision. Today I am healthy, fit and sitting on the porch of my own little beach house......I have an overwhelming sense of peace and joy. I am in balance.....my life is finally what I have worked hard for it to be. My finances are in balance....my body, soul and spiritual self is balanced. I have no worries.....my children are doing well financially and physically. .I have happiness, friendship, love, joy, peace and I am content.  I have another book started on the computer sitting on the beautiful desk just inside.....Life is good.....I sit and take in the wonderful breath of air filled with jasmine and honeysuckle mixed with a salty ocean breeze and I think.....AHHHHHHH!
This is my vision, this is where I am going and this is where I WILL BE by the time I turn 55. I have become a doer....not a gonna doer! I have set my goals and my eye is on the prize, I have begun to build the life I thought I was building all these years and I am ok with it......I am more than ok with it.....I am ECSTATIC! For once in my life I feel capable, able, strong, confident, positive and hopeful.......for real........not just a thought or a dream in my head but an actual reality. I know what I am called to do and I am not suprised by it anymore.....this is what I was always suppose to do....I just needed to learn some lessons before I was ready to embarq on this journey.....I smile because I know my Mom and Dad are smiling down on me and I can hear my Mom tell me ..."I told you so!" of course like mothers do. I can hear my Daddy say "I always knew you could do it, I don't know why you didn't know you could do it!" (He used to tell me that all the time.)
So here in print I am putting it out there......I will reach my goals, I will have my life that I want and I will do it by helping others to do the same.....and today.....I BELIEVE IT!