"WHY"?

When I first started Isagenix it was just a health product to me and honestly until I was actually on the product I didn't think it would be any different than the rest....little did I know that my life was about to change in a big way. Isagenix is a cleansing product that helps your body cleanse the toxins it encounters and it does it on a cellular level....that is the scientific part of it. I have began more than a body cleanse....I have begun to cleanse my life from the toxins, the pain, the negativity and all of the past "yuk". I didn't plan on it being this way it just happened....or so I thought until today.

Once I started to feel the results of this amazing product my belief in it became overwhelming and I discovered that this was a way to fulfill one of the dreams I had always had of being a nutritionist that would help people nutritionally heal their bodies. I have endless books on the power of healing foods, however I gave up on that dream because of the schooling it required....I just didn't see myself putting in that kind of time...so I let that dream go....along with myself and my own health.

In network marketing you must be on a constant journey of self development and for the first time in my life I have felt "open" and "coachable"....so I began not knowing what I was really looking for. I am learning to set goals, have a vision, and the steps to achieve what I want. Typical right? I felt just that way....like I was going through these motions but I didn't know why....."WHY"....a big part of the journey in self improvement is finding your "why".  Well of course I know my "why" I thought....to have financial freedom, to be able to help my kids like my parents helped me, to be able to move to that little shack on the beach and spend my afternoons writing and to be healthy so that I will not die like my parents did. Sounds great right? These are still very big "whys" for me and will remain in my list of "whys", however something was happening to me emotionally that I did not understand. August is a tough month for me because it is the month that my parents both became ill and passed...August and September...I just chalked it up to that.

One of my most favorite young people, a billionaire at the age of 27, a motivational writer and speaker is Jordan Wirz. He is not my favorite because of the things I just listed....he is my favorite because he took the time one day to recognize an email and remember someone that was in need of his help. I believe that the connections I have been having lately are gifts from God, a sort of divine intervention on my behalf. That is a whole other story.....anyway I am reading and working the steps in his book and in this moment in the middle of one of his chapters it hit me like a ton of bricks....Emotion washed over me like this raging wave that I could not control, I felt as if I had been knocked off my feet and my stomach felt strange....A single tear dropped onto the page and the floodgates were opened....I sprung to my feet and started pacing because this is the month, or rather 2 months that I do not allow myself to cry because if I do I'm afraid I won't stop. Well, the pacing didn't help because these "ah ha" moments kept coming at me just like the crashing waves on a beach....one minute rolling the next crashing. It was and is the most incredible discovery I have made and for the first time I think that I have done two things....One I have discovered the reason I am so passionate and so relentless about this nutritional product and the problems we are facing with our health.....Two...I am beginning to heal. I have discovered the biggest "Why" I have to do what I am doing....in doing this business as a Health, Wellness and Cleansing Coach I have the opportunity to help people become healthy and the opportunity to heal my pain of losing my parents. What do the two have to do with each other? Let me tell you......

When my mother became ill with COPD they told us it was from smoking, of course that was the obvious reason. Me, being the researcher that I am, (which by the way I took from my Mom) started researching her options and of course why she got this horrifying disease. I found out about the chemicals used to treat the tobacco and was shocked that they were allowed. I also knew that she had painted with every type of chemical laden paint there was, she hated bugs so she sprayed the strongest pesticides she could find, she remodeled every house we ever had, which meant dealing with possible lead paint and asbestos and God knows what else. The more I researched the more I knew what was coming. Then the medications began, most of which she was allergic to.....the meds that she needed the most made her worse....She had a great doctor and he nutritionally counseled her, helped her to gain weight and begin to fight the battle she had in front of her. Through all of my research I couldn't help her, I couldn't change anything.....I was helpless...I turned it over to God and was there for her through every step....right up until the night she collapsed in my arms and I knew I was getting ready to say goodbye. I was angry....not at God...but at the tobacco companies, the paint companies....and I vowed to avoid any type of chemicals because I myself had already experience chemical toxicity. I lost my Mom, my best friend on August 18, 2004 she was 64 years young.

My Dad lived three years longer than my Mom....but not without pain and suffering from his own diseases. He was a walking miracle. In his lifetime he had underwent 18 MAJOR surgeries. He had spinal and neck fusions, gallbladder, appendix, stomach cancer, defibrillator and pacemaker, and a triple aortic aneurysm from which he only had a 10% chance of living. On top of all of this he also had skin cancer and diabetes. He was amazing...he ran around at 74 like he was 30. He never let anything stop him...he had life in him....His neck and back problems were due to accidents, however his other conditions were due to diet....you see my Dad was a complete meat and potatoes man, from the South, everything fried. He was also a big bacon, sausage and processed meat eater. All chemical laden foods. After his stomach cancer in which he had most of his stomach removed he began to eat a little better until my Mom passed and then he did whatever he wanted because he knew....if his time was limited he was going to live the life out of it....and he did.
When he would start feeling bad I would research the recent medications he was on....19 of them to count...and find out the side effects and what he could do nutritionally to help....some of those meds actually contributed to his heart problems and blood sugar issues.....but they were needed to treat the same problems...Is that crazy? We had to be careful of supplements and I tried to help him with anything I could....I couldn't help him.....Congestive Heart Failure took him from me September 27, 2007.

My parents struggled their whole lives to give me and my siblings the best that they could....we always thought we were rich.....we weren't rich with money....we were rich with love. I watched my Mom cry at night over a stack of bills and I also watched and helped them build companies that gave them a little financial freedom in the latter part of their lives....however....most of it they gave to their children and grandchildren. In my Dad's final year he lived with a huge financial burden and worry that he would outlive the money he had, which he did and he began to live on credit cards. Most of this I didn't realize until after he passed....It made me scared to think that I might be there someday......being worried about affording my medication or food. This is not how we were meant to live our lives in our Golden Years.......I knew I had to do something different, however I felt lost....what was I going to do? Divorced, broke, and losing everything I had....which honestly meant nothing to me because I knew what real loss was now....I began to explore my possibilities...with no success....I felt as though I were hitting a wall at every turn.

I wanted to be the parent to my children that my parents were to me....but that didn't seem to be God's plan...I started Isagenix and realized I could become whatever I wanted....I decide my income...sounds great right? Again....keep hitting walls....until tonight...the wall came down or I stepped through a door....either way I know WHY.....I KNOW MY WHY!

I couldn't help them.....no matter what I did, how much I researched....I COULDN'T SAVE THEM! No matter what I did I couldn't make my Dad's final years easier like he had made so many of mine. I know my parents were proud of me and loved me and I have no doubt in their belief in me....my doubt has been of myself..until tonight.

This all brings me to my "ah ha" moment that has me still reeling...that is why I had to get it out in print...I'm still processing this.....I am very, very, very serious about Isagenix....and sometimes I feel strange because I am so emotional about it.....again...chalking it up to the emotional months....until tonight. I hear of someone else being diagnosed with Cancer....a child suffering from a brain tumor....friends with heart problems....and I cry.....thinking "Damn.....if only they would have known about all of this before".....I knew I loved this product and I know it is changing lives....I see it...there are facts....it is not something that you need to "buy into"....It is real...the danger is real....and I want to change that.

I am watching people I love struggle everyday financially and physically......one affects the other...they go hand in hand....Single mom's getting laid off, unemployment cut...not way to pay their bills or feed their children....Families losing everything. Families face with medical crisis' and no money to pay for the help they need. It is frightening and unnecessary. I am drawn to help.....I feel as though I am called to do this...like I have been preparing my whole life for this time. I want to change this

I do what I do because I couldn't save them.....I couldn't change the damage....I certainly knew I couldn't take on the food industry, tobacco industry, chemical, pharmaceutical, etc., I felt in some way as though I had let them down.....I know that it was not my job to "fix it" or "save" them and I didn't even know I had this weighing on me until tonight....I knew there was something that I couldn't heal....I thought it was just because I missed them so much...and that won't ever change but this was something deeper....something that kept me up at nights...I couldn't save them but I CAN help save someone.....I can help my family and friends know about these terrible things that cause so much damage....I can teach my children and my grandchildren to help themselves be protected and hopefully change something in this toxic world.....I can take my pain and turn it into something amazing.

My "Why"?...........You just read it......this is something I must do and in doing it I will help heal that part of me that felt like I should have known.

I'm not sure I can explain the feeling I have tonight...my emotions are all over...I feel relief, empowered, excited....tired ......and inspired.

I would suggest to any of you that read this to discover yourself.....a great start is a book called Become Incredible by Jordan Wirz. He lives in Las Vegas and is a very kind and wonderful person. This book will bring you to your knees .....do the work in it....You are worth it and I'm glad I am.....it is a journey...one that I do not believe ends and it is hard..sometimes there are tears,anger and denial....then you work through them and find the joy....because that my friends is what we should be living....a joy filled life...loving what we do and doing what we love.

For the first time in a long time I am looking forward to the morning, I have a whole new outlook and know that I need to trust myself and my feelings.....I know that people might get sick of me telling them about it but I will not stop.....I cant....I have to do everything I can to help people help themselves and I do not feel bad about it all.....Thank you Mom and Dad....even in your afterlife you are still pushing me towards being the best I can be and inspiring me....I miss you.