Cheese and Crackers

It was late at night, the other kids were asleep and she was sleepy but there was no way she would walk out of that kitchen. The little girl sat at the kitchen table, she had a lump in her throat from choking back the tears. She put her little hand on her mama's and was able to speak only a few words "Don't worry Mama, Daddy will be home soon....it will be ok". They had been fighting earlier and he had left to cool off. Her mama's friend had called and he was there......he had been crying too. Her mama smiled, wiped her tears and asked "Do you want to call your Daddy?" The little five year old that was trying so hard to hold it together for her,  swallowed and nodded as her mama put the phone in her little hands and dialed. He answered, he had been sleeping, he had to be at work in just a few hours. "Hey baby....don't be sad" he said in a groggy voice. "Daddy will be home right after work tomorrow, ok? Give your mama a kiss for me and go night night" She answered "Ok Daddy, I love you". She was choking on her tears, but she would not let him hear it....she was his big girl. "I love you too baby" he whispered and then he hung up.
Her Mama took the phone and gave her a hug..."do you want to sleep in your daddy's spot tonight?" Her little eyes lit up, she finally took a deep breath and took her mama's hand.
She didnt understand why they were fighting but there was one thing she was sure of.....she was sure of the love. Her Mama had a hot temper, she knew that. She also knew they loved each other beyond measure, the kind of love that would transcend time.She had a deep connection with her mama even at such a young age. She felt her joy, her pain, her love, her hate, her happiness, her sadness, her pride and her disappointment. She knew there was a reason for her to be so mad and she didnt question it or judge her. She also thought her Daddy was the best thing since peanut butter, he was her hero, her protector and she was his "little leach". It was then that she began to learn the meaning of diplomacy, that there were always two sides and sometimes both of those sides could be right.


Of course the next day her daddy came home....all the kids rushed to greet him at the door as her Mama stepped out of the kitchen to look on. "Dinner will be ready soon" she said. He grinned that sheepish little grin that caught her eye the first day she met him and pulled a box of chocolates from behind his back. "I'm sorry....you know I love you" he whispered as he hugged her. Tears welled up in her mama's eyes as she looked over at the little girl standing behind them, the other kids had already ran back to their play....not her...she was the "big sister", she had to make sure it was ok. Her mama winked at her and her daddy turned around and picked her up "Go play little leach, Daddy's home" he said. He put her down, she jumped for joy, ran to make sure the other kids were ok and tell them it was all good.


Over the years this little girl would take her job as "big sister" very seriously. She had to set the example she was told.....she ate spinach, squash and many other things just to trick her siblings into eating their veggies! She would fight with, fight for and mow down anyone that would mess with her brothers or sister....it was her job along with making the peace. Her mama would tell her "You are the peacemaker, it is what you do and always will"......sometimes she would argue that point and her mama would remind her of the bible and tell her "Remember...... the peacemakers shall inherit the kingdom of heaven" so of course she would come around!


This wasn't the last time that little girl would sit with her Mama at the kitchen table late at night, there would be many more nights over the next 40 years. They had begun a tradition, cheese and crackers and a glass of milk would sooth over many tears, accompany many stories and celebrate many victories. These were not always sad times, many were filled with laughter, many were problem solving, scheme planning nights and they would carry over to the next generation. They would be joined by another daughter, a granddaughter, that became her mama's little kitchen table buddy, her Nana's little kitchen table buddy.....oh the discussions that were had on those late nights.
That little girl was me and even now that my beautiful mother is gone and my hero, my daddy has gone to join her I still have cheese and crackers with a glass of milk when I am feeling sad or lonely late at night. I close my eyes and she is still right here with me, I can hear her laughter and my daddy telling me "I love you too baby" (which were the last words he said to me before he passed)......a sense of safety, warmth and joy fill my heart.......I usually call my sister to talk and then all is right again.